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©2009 =SaxGirl1010
:iconsaxgirl1010:

Artist's Comments

Just something I started last night in a bout of insomnia, inspired by one of my favorite angry songs, "Voice Like a Nova," by the Christian metal band Sever Your Ties. If ever there was a better theme song for Versa than FireFlight's "Unbreakable," it's this. Just check out the lyrics:

How long will you simple ones
Live your simple ways
And fools hate knowledge
We should think before we say

The animal, the animal has overtaken
You deserve it
Disaster, disaster sweeps over you
Like a whirlwind, a whirlwind

Wisdom calls out in the street
A voice is raised in public
At the head of noisy streets she will speak
In the gateways of the city, she cries out

We ignore it something so important
We ignore it so easy to permit


Listen to it here. It's worth it.

EDIT 1: Thanks so much for the really helpful feedback/critiques. I adjusted Versa's arm, widened her hips a bit, and got rid of the "Barbie doll neck," for the most part. :)

I'm still thinking this would look cool if I painted over it and made it a really dramatic digital painting...

Reference: Posemaniacs, and the new cover of Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10...
Credit: Versa and the artwork are (C) =SaxGirl1010.

Critiques


:iconsesakaheart:
I always love your transformation drawings! I always wanted to know and learn to make cloth pulls and tears as realistic as this. You also inspire me to practice more on musculature on anatomy! Your talent is amazing.

The problems I see is what anyone else pointed out before. The chin looks like that of what you see in action figures with that visible line between the throat and the chin. There should be a smooth, downward curve where the 'doll' line is.
Female figures have more curved hips. When you curve hips, it will take away the male-look to the pelvis. Also, I have to agree that the angle of the pelvis itself it directed towards us and should be aligned with the rest of the body on top. Example: When you look up at a tower with awnings pointed to one direction, all facing the upper-left of your view. Hopes this will help! :)
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:iconaquae:
As with all of your sketches, your lines are beautifully clean and the weight you give them is wonderful, beautiful job with that. :)

You asked for critique so I wanted to leave you some. :D This is a very dynamic and awesome angle, doing poses like this at grand perspectives are difficult but when done right really leave the viewer with something much more fascinating to look at. :)

The first thing I noticed was her chin/neck area. Where the underside of her chin meets her neck, I don't think we should be seeing such a thick line like that, it makes them look separate or disjointed. - Like a Barbie doll with a jointed head. :) I think what you're going to see more is the main muscle and esophagus of the throat showing (Because of her head leaned back), and a smooth curve up to where neck meets chin. I would reference your own neck in the mirror at this angle and see how the chin meets the neck. That's a HARD pose, I've had problems with tilted-back heads myself before. :)

Her pelvis also feels like it's not at the same angle as the rest of her body. It looks more like it's facing us directly, while the rest of her upper body feels more like it's turned away from us just a bit. :)

You mention wanting critique on the arm. - That's a hard one for me! I can only imagine how difficult the foreshortening on it must be. I think as far as her left arm goes, you may want to pull her elbow out away from her body more. When I try to replicate the pose myself, pretending to "rip" my shirt in a similar fashion that feels natural, my elbows actually don't stay very close to my body at all, they kind of kick out a bit. That's just what feels most natural to me. I think showing a bit more of her forearm will help achieve this.

I hope you find these critiques helpful. You've done an amazing job on this so far so I cannot wait to see how even *more* awesome it looks once you get some good critiques on it! :D Great job, you should be so proud of yourself! :)
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5 out of 7 deviants thought this was fair.

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Comments


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:iconmalignant-librarian:
Can't talk long, gotta run -- quick critique go! the underside of her chin is wonky; the human throat shouldn't have a 'seam' there. Fix man-pelvis; even if she is sort of manly, all women have a distinct pelvis shape -- it's truly what makes 'em female. The angle of the pelvis is a little kooky. Lastly, psuedoforshortening tip; everything gets thicker closer to the camera. So her wrist shouldn't taper as it comes down to the hand but get significantly bigger.

Lemme know if you're really struggling and I can redline what I'm thinkin'. Good luck guh gtg

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God, save us from your followers.
:iconsaxgirl1010:
LOL, even for a "quick critique" I'll take it to heart. It was short and sweet but I'll make the fixes. Thank ya Jingles! :hug:

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:iconninjabaker:
Her boobs look a little... "awk". I'm not sure why. Weird shapes I guess? But just around the edges. Sorry I can't offer more critique than that on those. :(
<strike>But this is the part where I make a wisecrack about this being my area of speciality?</strike>

and the hands look a little weird, like at the wrists. I think people have discussed this already. ^^;

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Est Sularas oth Mithas: my honor is my life
I could never give that up
:katana:
:iconninjabaker:
gah, HTML formatting is lame.

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Est Sularas oth Mithas: my honor is my life
I could never give that up
:katana:
:icondragoniade:
Nice work on the TF. Nice details with the muscles too.

There's 2 small things I think are a bit off. The hands seem to bend at a very great angle, near a point of breaking, and the chest seem to be off angle with the rest of the body.

But overall, really great work.

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:iconsaxgirl1010:
For some reason strikeouts don't work in comments, only in journals. :(

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:iconsaxgirl1010:
Could be, I sorta threw them on there. :XD:

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:iconsaxgirl1010:
Thanks for the input on the hands... I think it'll just take some more tweaking. They DO sorta look like they might snap off, haha.

Thanks! =D

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:iconninjabaker:
good to know. ><

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Est Sularas oth Mithas: my honor is my life
I could never give that up
:katana:

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